Enjoy The Silence

I had a strange October. My family (my wife and two kids ages 5 and soon to be 3) went a 3 week tour of family back home.  They visited my wife’s sister in Kentucky, saw my family from Illinois (where I grew up) and stayed with wife’s family in Iowa (where she grew up).  It was a great trip for them and I’m glad they had the chance to go and spend time with so many loved ones. 

 My house is typically…..chaotic.  Not in the bad sense of the word, but in the “bursting from the seams with energy” sense of the word.  It’s a good chaotic.  Ninja fights, car races, princess tea parties, running, jumping, screaming, and laughing…..and we just hit breakfast. I’ve come to associate home with noise. The thing that was odd for me, was the absolute silence that greeted me in their absence.

Silence that was, as the oxymoronic statement goes, “so quiet it was deafening.”  The silence, at first was a bit unsettling, but as I became used to it, I saw value. The quietness provided much needed mental respite. It gave my mind time to find clarity and to be creative.

This is no shock. Silence is good for us. Meditation, prayer, solitude are good for us mentally, spiritually, and physically.  I missed my family very much, but the silence was a silver lining or a consolation prize. 

Our culture is not good with this concept. We live in a constant stream of information, stimulation, and noise. The noise blends together to form a constant hum. A hum that is like a blanket that is so ever present it becomes part of us. It’s an addiction, really. We go to sleep with music or television as a companion. As Sandy struck last week, many people who lost power told me they used their generators to run a TV/DVD player.  We want to be wrapped snugly into our cocoon of sound.

I believe there are many reasons. If we drown out our thoughts we don’t have to face ourselves, our issues, our stresses. If we can bury our heads in the techno age buzz we can avoid life.  The problem is, as we sink deeper into the abyss of noise and over stimulation, life continues on. Nay, it hurtles on….quickly.  The noise fills us with lies, commercials, material desires, confusion.

Here is the point, an I’m right there with you, my time of silence informed me of this concept: we have to unplug. Our noise addiction has to stop. The need to fuel this desire robs us of our humanity, it steals human interaction. This interaction is what creates community.  Our desire to be surrounded by sound steals our time. It makes us sit in front of the TV instead going out for a walk.  It makes us get on the internet instead of opening a book. It has us pop in a DVD instead of writing in a journal. Most of all it keeps us from observing ourselves, from learning about ourselves, and thus becoming who we are supposed to be. It’s artificial living and drowns out our true potential.

My goal for myself and I share it with you: let’s take back our lives and fill our time with our dreams, goals, relationships, and growth. All it will take is the will to unplug from our technology, our overly busy schedule (perhaps artificially busy schedules), and choose to sit everyday for a few moments in silence. In these moments learn who you are, set goals, dream, see the life you want….and then do it.

In health, Dr. Graham


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